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2003-12-28 | 11:13 p.m.
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"I had a lover,I don't think I'll risk another"

Now I feel retarded. I thought i was invited to go to this party with the male roomies, but apparently it wasn't really gelled. I called to see what was up and they were already there. "we're here at the whisky bar, but i don't know how long we're staying." Translation: "you could come and meet us here, if you are lame and so desparate to hang out that you'd drive all the way downtown to spend a half hour here." I guess the boy i have a stupid, stupid crush on has to work at 7:30, so they aren't staying long. So, i'm left with no choice but to pretend i called him to tell him the story about how i've been sitting the wrong cat for the last 5 hours and didnt know it becuase my neighbor's cat decided it lived here.

This last paragraph, folks, is exactly why having a crush on a guy sucks the chrome off of a trailer hitch of a V12 Dodge pickup with longhorn insignia on the back window.

What i didn't tell him is that i've been practising guitar so long for the last two days in anticipation of playing him the song "these days" by nico (which he burned that album for me), (and which was really fucking hard to learn) that my middle finger is purple, and that i'm drinking alone, and that i've been on the internet for nearly two hours, and that i tried on 5 outfits already, and i am a total fucking dweeb.

THIS IS WHAT THIS SHIT DOES TO ME! IT MAKES ME A CRAZY PERSON!

In better news, i talked to debbie finally, and i would be super stoked if she came to texas, because, clearly folks....I need help.


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